A space to post my thoughts and musings about anything. This includes but is not limited to community, politics, current events, dating, GLBTQ issues, favorite things, and stuff that would make your dead relatives blush. I am not afraid to go there, as some can attest.

August 11, 2008

Acceptance

They say that the five stages of a breakup are shock, denial, anger, bargaining, and acceptance. With the events of the last few weeks, leading up to yesterday, it's like JH and I ended up stepping through those stages together.

The first time we broke up was the shock, when we got back together, it was the denial, the second breakup was the anger (including some anger I had after it), and coming into last night, it was the bargaining. JH and I went to a Bowie Baysox game that I had gotten tickets for. Towards the end of the game, some dialogue started, and after the game was over we talked in the parking lot for a long time. We still love one another, we enjoy the companionship and friendship we have, and we connect on a deep level. However, there is a personality conflict that right now cannot be resolved. We discussed different companionship situations, but ultimately we agreed that the adult decision would be to be just friends and nothing more. Otherwise the potential to make one another completely mental is very high. We went to JR's later that night, hung out, and it was fine, no pressure there.

As painful as it is, I love JH enough to let him go and find what it is he wants. I still get to see him, and I'm welcome at his parent's house, which is good because I do like being able to hang out with sports fans :-)

So now we are here at acceptance, I can accept that it's time to move on and step back out there. Things ended well, there is no bitterness, no drama, and I am all the better for it. I wish JH well and hope he finds happiness. As for me, let's sit back and see where things go in my life.