Tensions...

...or why my life feels like an episode of "The Starter Wife" sometimes.

It's been nearly two months since I broke up with Mike, and I get the feeling there are some mutual friends who have problems with the fact that we broke up. I should have expected it of course, but I'm just not happy with the way it's being handled, especially because I have no real way to do or say anything about it that won't cause drama. Even talking about it here has the potential to start a drama-war.

I have noticed that some have become rather quiet towards me. They would regularly talk to me before, but now it almost seems like I have to wave my arms to get their attention, and even then, it can feel a bit tense. Okay, maybe it didn't help for some that I have started bringing a new guy around. However, I wouldn't necessarily bring a guy around my friends unless I felt that everyone involved could get along and at least be on a good level of respect. I'm not the type who is going to bring around a new guy every week, I don't change boyfriends as often as I change the sheets on my bed.

Still, the situation ties in a bit to "The Starter Wife" in that when those wives lose their husbands, suddenly they're cut off from their friends and all their connections that got them into places or the things they wanted. I feel that some are either consciously or unconsciously punishing me over my own breakup by cutting me out of the picture. It's not a good feeling, if only because I have been making an effort to be out with the people I know. I am a social person, I don't deny that, and the last thing I would do is cut someone off just because their relationship changed, so am I wrong for wanting the same sort of respect from the people I know?

This is not easy, but I hope with time that tensions ease and people become comfortable with the fact that I'm not with Mike anymore, I'm moving on because I can't just sit at home and mope, that's not going to do anything to help me.